arghhh im fed up with my dad!!

Guest

Sorry girls.. just a rant really...

basically my dad has hardly been about in the 21 years i been alive.. cant remember last b-day card etc ive had off him ( not that it bothers me anymore tbh but you get the jist of what im saying ) anyways he kinda turned up.. last year wanting to try and form some sort of relationship between us and ive been happy to try, inviting him around here meeting for coffee ( that ive paid for every time ) have even bought him a bit of shopping. I've got to add he's been an alcoholic for 12-15 years and has apparently been diagnosed a skitzofrenic. I told him from the beginning if he wants any sort of relationship with me he has to get off the drink once and for all and ive heard through family he has been really trying ( but keeps slipping up then has none for a week then slips up again ) I can understand how hard it is for him but as a mummy to be I have to be tough on him as I really dont want him around my little boy if he's gonna be drinking etc.

i'll get to the point..
saw him in town this morning and he seemed fine spoke to him about him coming over tomorrow for an hour or 2 n he said ill be there about 10:30 to which I said thats great i'll meet you at the bus stop so give me a call when your on the bus.. anywhoo.. got home from town and he tries calling me several times at this point I was busy trying to clean up and sort washing out upstairs so didnt hear my phone ring.
next minute im getting a call on my old phone ( i told him to get rid of number as i dont use it anymore my little brother does for when hes out playing ) unknown number i heard it go off so answered it and it was the police telling me he's cut his wrists/hands with a knife and an ambulance is taking him to hospital .... arghhh im not quite sure what was expected of me at the time as my dad knows i have custody of my brother and cant just up n get to a hospital when hes due home in an hour.. the police asked me if they should go round the corner and tell my nan I told them yes..

spoke to my boyfriend after I got off the phone and I said I reckon he did it coz I didnt answer the phone to him.. but its not my fault I didnt hear it go off... now im feeling pressured to make sure I answer the phone every time he calls or he'll do something stupid.. but I dont need that pressure and I dont feel he should make me feel this way Sad

think im asking for some advice or something as im stuck on what to do about the situation...

Guest

aww sending you big hugs, i dont really know what to say but didnt want to read and run,xxxxx you shouldnt feel bad about what your dad did, it wasnt your fault, he must have been very unstable at the time to do that, alot of things probably caused him to do it, not just you missing his calls, try not to blame yourself xxxxxxx

Subject: Re: arghhh im fed up with my dad!! Wed Mar 11, 2009 2:17 pm

Big hugs hun. Dont blame yourself its not your fault.Like mand says he must have been unstable.And with the drinking and having skitzofrenic. would not have helped.

Guest

I know where you're coming from, dad not being in your life much, then they turn up expecting the world hun, I've had the same deal with my father.You must not blame yourself for what has happened, just because you didn't take his calls, wouldn't make him do something like that, and if it did and he is that unstable, then he needs help.

You have a lot of your own to deal with at the moment, expecting a little one and looking after your bro, so don't feel pressurized to do anything.It sounds a little harsh (and i dont wanna upset ya) but the way I think about my father is - if he could go without you for all them years, then he cant depend on you now.

Guest

Big hugs hunni xx

Guest

Thanks girls,
made me feel lots better about the situation now
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